It's an alternative version of the Adam and Eve story written by Julia Bolden in a media workshop at St John’s Theological College, Nottingham, UK
Edenhouse
The time came when the Lord God formed a man’s body from the dust of the ground and breathed into it the breath of life, and the man became a living person. Then the Lord God built a house in the west, which he called Edenhouse. And he placed in the house the man he had formed.
The Lord ensured that the house was in perfect order, with electricity, central heating, and food and cooking equipment in the kitchen. He put all sorts of furniture in the house, and in the living room he put a television set with four channels. The Lord God placed the man in Edenhouse as its householder, to take care of it and to keep it in the order in which God himself had put it, but the Lord God gave the man this warning: “You may watch any of the programmes on the television, except for the fourth channel. This is the channel of the knowledge of good and evil. This you may not watch, for this channel will open your eyes, to make you aware of right and wrong, good and evil. If you watch this channel you will be doomed to die.”
The Lord decided that it was not good for the man to be alone, so he resolved to make a companion for him, a helper suited to his needs. So the Lord God formed from the soil every kind of machine. Among them was a washing machine for his clothes, an electric toaster for his breakfast, a typewriter for his writing, a calculator for his calculations, and a record player and records for his entertainment. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and whatever he called them, that was their name. But still there was no proper helper for the man. He needed someone who could combine all the skills offered by the machines, and also be a companion for him. Then the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep, and he took one of his ribs, closed up the place from where he had taken it, and made the rib into a woman. “This is it”, Adam exclaimed. “She is part of my own bone and flesh. Her name is woman, because she was taken from a man”. Now this explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife in such a way that the two become one person.
The house was just the right size for the two of them to live in, and it never occurred to either of them that it ought to be any larger. They had no need of money, for God had provided all that they required, but neither of them were aware of this. They had no reason to disagree with one another and nothing to fight for. They were completely satisfied, in their innocence.
Then one day a parrot flew into the house through the window. He was proud and was continually talking to himself and admiring himself in the mirror. In the evening, while the woman was in the kitchen, he spoke to her. “Not allowed to watch the tv, then?” “of course we’re allowed to watch it,” replied Eve. “It’s only the fourth channel that we’re forbidden to watch. God says that if we do we will die”. “Rubbish!”, squawked the parrot. “Won’t die! Won’t die! Rubbish! Understand! Eyes opened! Good and bad!”
The woman was convinced. She went into the living room, where Adam was, and switched channels. As she watched she saw a bright light appear in the centre of the screen. Adam was astonished by what he saw. As they watched, they heard a voice speaking to them from the set. “You are Adam and Eve, the first man and woman to be placed on the earth, but have you not noticed that God has you completely under his control? Are you content with what God has provided for you? Would you not prefer to have a larger house? Are there not more possessions you could have? Could you not be more successful in providing for yourselves? Do you not think you ought to have rights of your own which you could fight for?” As the voice went on, they saw the light on the screen grow larger and brighter until it almost blinded them.
Then they began to feel guilty. They switched off the set and ran and hid from the Lord, Eve in the kitchen under the table, Adam in the bedroom under the bed. Adam heard God’s footsteps on the stairs, approaching nearer and nearer, but there was no way of escape.
God entered the room and commanded Adam to come out from his hiding place, and Adam was forced to admit that he had been watching the forbidden fourth channel. “But”, he added, “it was the woman you gave me who switched it on”. The Lord entered the kitchen and spoke to Eve. He asked her, “How could you do such a thing?” “The parrot tricked me”, she replied. So the Lord God said to the parrot, “This is your punishment. No longer will you be free to fly around as you please. You will be kept in a cage and you will have to rely on human beings to provide you with food.” And to Adam God said, “Because you listened to your wife and watched the fourth channel when I told you not to, I have placed a curse on your head. You will have to struggle to build your own house and to earn enough money to support yourself and your wife. Finally you will return to the ground from which you came. For you were made from the ground, and to the ground you will return.”
Then the Lord God threw Adam and Eve out of Edenhouse, and locked and bolted the doors and took away the key and barred up the windows so that they could not return.
